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I really enjoy learning about other cultures. In my teens I was all about the Brits. Right now I’m kind of obsessed with Asia. It started with K-Pop, then immigrant stories from a Chinese pov, and now I’m really fascinated by Japanese culture and customs.
Watching Netflix’s hit Japanese export Terrace House has made me understand Japanese culture more than most Anime could. While the show is a reality show, it does not seem scripted to me. The lives of the members seem so simple and uneventful that the scripting would be incredibly atypical- just chill, don’t cause any drama.
If you have no idea what Terrace House is, please read this post or listen to this quick episode I recorded with Crazy 4 Comic Con creator Tony Kim. (Pssst Tony also created the wonderfully stylish fashion line Hero Within.)
On the show, some members try to date. The process is fascinating.
Dating starts off with one on one hangouts that are not meant to be explicitly romantic. PDA is a huge deal. Hand holding would be too much even for a married couple.
After those one-on-ones, one member of the couple may decide to Kokuhaku, confess. They confess their “love” to the other and ask them to become exclusive. Only then are they in a relationship.
The confession is a standard part of life yet it is still very nerve-wracking. And the love bit isn’t exactly as intense as it sounds.
In Japanese there are two words- one means “like” and the other means true “love.” A kokuhaku uses the like word, suki/daisuki.
In one of the Terrace House seasons, one housemate confesses to her male housemate. He does not reciprocate. She feels very embarrassed and hurt and he later moves out.
As people come and go in the show, she meets someone new who is very interested in her. They go out to the same spot where she performed her unsuccessful kokuhaku to the other housemate. This time the new guy confesses to her and they become a very happy couple.
This was a very sweet scene on the show. Because of the way Terrace House works, the new housemate was able to watch that scene. As we watched him watch, we saw how upset it made him to see the woman he liked get hurt.
To read more about kokuhaku, check out this great article by Tofugu.
Read more about Terrace House here and some of the Japanese I learned from it here.
Have you heard of kokuhaku?
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